Fighting the Tide

We’ve all been there – feeling like we’re constantly battling the tide, attempting to keep our heads above water, to feel like we’re in some kind of control of our lives. Well, I know I do.

I’m not too sure about you, but life is slightly chaotic at the moment and I feel like writing this is good therapy and cathartic. Don’t get me wrong, I like being busy, heck, I think I even thrive from being under pressure but I feel like sometimes, it’s important to take a breather and to really take stock of what’s going on and to enjoy the moment we’re currently experiencing.

Never has this point been more important as Raife’s first birthday looms. I cannot believe that in exactly four weeks’ time, our little baby will become a toddler. It seems like only yesterday I was at the Royal Gwent Hospital, birthing, whilst watching the fireworks explode over the city. Over the next few days, I’m going to be paying special attention to my little one, breathing in his smell and watching him continue to explore the world as he prepares to take on the next leap of his life. We’ll be throwing him a first birthday party with his close friends and family (which we still need to arrange!) and although I’ll be singing “Happy Birthday” with the inevitable tears and nostalgia, I know that I’ll be feeling extremely proud of the son we’ve raised. With a sigh I say, time really does fly and it really is true what they say – the days are long but the years are very short.

Work has been manic too – with an exciting Expo planned at the Motorpoint, welcoming non-other than Lord Alan Sugar AND Grant Cardone, no less, it’s going to an incredible day that I feel honored to be a part of. When planning an event of this scale, it’s a great responsibility and it can seem at times that there’s a mountain of work to climb but in the midst of the chaos, it’s important to remember to have fun and to enjoy the whole experience. The hard work will all be worth it and I know that I’ll feel incredibly proud to be a part of a small team who have managed to create such an iconic event.

Over the past few weeks, our house has been hit with illness, our son was taken to hospital (don’t worry – he’s okay) and Jon’s been away working a lot, meaning different routines different nursery pick-ups and a lot more time on my own. If you’re anything like me, a change in routine is difficult to get used to, and arranging alternative childcare can be tough and stressful. Team that with unexplained illness, sleepless nights and exhaustion, it’s no wonder I feel like I’m bobbing just above the water. Fortunately for us, we have an amazing family who constantly offer to have Raife for us which means we can work and have date nights, allowing us time to breathe and to give us that break needed to regroup.

Jon and I have also made the decision to start thinking about our family’s future, our home and a couple of other exciting things which right now, feels overwhelming and stressful. Don’t get me wrong, I think it’s great to have goals, something to keep you motivated and focused but for us, these things have all come at once, by chance. Whilst it’s easy to feel stressed and bogged down with it all, I can’t help but feel there’s a reason why things come around when they do, which is why instead of fighting it, I’ve decided to embrace the opportunities presented.

As 2018 draws to a close, I think it’s good to look back at the year’s achievements as well as looking forward to 2019. 2018 was mainly focussed on Raife and enjoying maternity leave and enjoy it, I really did! I haven’t set any goals for 2019 as yet, but I am going to be kinder to myself – allowing myself time to breathe and not to feel guilty for having an “Emma Day” once in a while. It’s good to take a breather, to just stop and do something for you. I think it’s very easy to get caught up in everyday tasks and routines, but taking a day, a weekend or even longer to do the things you truly enjoy, is sure to give you some clear space to think and move on to the next challenge, whatever that may be!

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